Claim your power, be redeemed: A look at trafficking victims

My 20+ years working with abused women and children as a volunteer, prosecutor and attorney has taught me to never be surprised at what one human being can do to another. People are capable of inflicting tremendous physical damage on one another. Those wounds, however severe, will heal and leave scars. Scars that are often too embarrassing to talk about and a forever reminder of the abuse.
But, the wounds that are the hardest to heal are those inflicted to the heart, mind and soul. I know life isn’t fair, but, it is so unfair that a young girl who is looking for acceptance by peers, or a “boyfriend” or someone to fill that fatherly role gets snared by lies and deceit into a life of rape, torture and abuse.

These emotional chains that bind these young women are the hardest to break. It’s difficult to explain these chains and the bonds between the victim and trafficker to those who haven’t worked with these ladies and even more difficult to refrain from shaking these girls until they “get” it. They truly believe what they’ve been told all of these years. They truly believe all of the lies – the lies mixed in with just enough truth and just enough caring to make it all believable. We can’t undo years of lies and deceit in a matter of days, weeks or months. Sometimes those chains are there for years. And, it is those chains that call them back to their trafficker. It is those chains that so often bind them to that trafficker such that she will return to him – leaving the security of a safe house – to return to a life of rape and abuse.

It’s the lies to these girls that bother me the most. It’s those psychological, emotional and spiritual chains that anger me the most. It’s making the girl think it’s her idea, because “daddy needs you to help me with this one little thing”. It’s making the girl think she’s at fault. It’s making the girl think that he’s her savior, guardian, protector. It’s making the girl think that no one will ever believe her or help her if she asked for help, “the police will arrest you”. It’s making the girl think that because he goes to church or takes her to church or calls himself a Christian that it’s o.k. It’s making the girl think that God brought them together and that if she says no it’s a sin. I’ve even heard the lie that she’s breaking the commandment about honoring her father if she doesn’t do what he says, i.e., have sex with him and other men. It’s making the girl think that he’s her “daddy”.

It’s confirming those statements when the girl’s next “trick” is a pastor, a judge, an attorney, a cop. It’s confirming those statements when she’s arrested for prostitution and society views her as a criminal, a person who is willingly selling her body. Next time you see a “prostitute”, think of this: Can you honestly say that any female who is financially, spiritually, physically, mentally, and emotionally whole would sign on to have her body violated with objects never meant to be inside of anyone’s body: lit cigarettes, beer bottles, broom sticks, police batons and the list can go on and on. Can you honestly say that any female who is whole would sign on to being beaten with guns, 2x4s, nun-chucks, brooms, clothes hangers and anything else a pimp could get his hands on? I’m not just talking about adult women, I’m talking about underage girls. Teens who have ran away are often said to have “asked for it”. Really? Do you really think a 14 year old had this in mind when she ran away from home?

These victims can claim back their power. It’s a long process. It’s hard. It’s ugly. It’s frustrating.  There are many shelters/safe houses opening up, but that’s not enough. They need to be believed. They need encouragement from society. Help for the basic things: getting a GED, getting an ID/driver’s license, getting a legitimate job, learning to live on a budget, assurance that it’s okay to seek help and to tell what happened, assurance that they have the power within themselves to make it.

There are also legal remedies for victims. They can of course go through criminal proceedings against their trafficker and seek victim’s compensation. However, there are also civil remedies in both state and federal courts. Victims can file lawsuits against the traffickers, hotels, websites, and other agencies that have been complicit in the crime. I’ve seen many hotel clerks turn a blind eye to what is around him – even having one flat out tell me nothing like that was happening in the hotel only to be told the complete opposite by the security guard. Hotel clerks have called rooms where victims and traffickers are to tell them cops are in the area and to stay inside. There are websites that knowingly allow ads to be placed with young girls who are “fresh” or “new” or “petite” or using other such language indicative to the trained eye that the person is underage.

Victims deserve to have someone walk with them through the criminal proceedings and pursue civil remedies. I’ve walked this path with victims and ready and willing to walk it with more. One such victim gave me the bracelet seen in the picture and told me she was not merely a “survivor” but that she had been redeemed, hence the “R” on the bracelet. I love that. Webster gives the following definitions for “redeem”:

1a: to buy back : repurchase

b: to get or win back

2: to free from what distresses or harms: such as

a: to free from captivity by payment of ransom

b: to extricate from or help to overcome something detrimental

c: to release from blame or debt : clear

d: to free from the consequences of sin

3: to change for the better : reform

4: repair, restore

Victims deserve to claim their power and take back their lives to become not just a survivor but be redeemed.

No representation is made that the quality of legal services to be performed is greater than those performed by other lawyers.