A Blessed Woman: a CHRISTmas Story

I’ve struggled with things I learned – or really didn’t learn – going to church my entire life. I write this as a 46-year-old woman who rarely missed a Sunday church service in her entire lifetime. As I sit here writing this blog, I can’t say that, when I was a tween, I knew things weren’t right or that there should have been this or that. Though I have vivid memories of sitting in church and feeling inferior as a female, I didn’t think it was necessarily “wrong” because I was devoted to God and, by default, the church. If this is what the preacher was preaching, it must be right. If this is how the church structured services and what roles women had, it must have been right. I was a good girl and wanted to follow what these men of God were telling me, through their words and actions. I was a product of my time, with the teachings and preaching of the 80s and 90s.

Not Another Deconstructing Faith Story

It wasn’t until I was a senior in high school and declared that God called me to be an attorney that I realized my desire to be a professional woman was putting me at odds with my conservative evangelical roots.  But, I knew God called me to that profession. And, I instinctively knew that women were not inferior to men – even in the church – even though I began to sense that was what was insinuated, if not outright said.

Before you dismiss this as just some other exvangelical “deconstructing” her faith – it’s not that at all. I detest the word “deconstructing” as it relates to our faith. My struggles and journey have been about learning, reading the Bible with fresh eyes, and opening my eyes to what the Bible really says about women. This journey really took off when I was a full time missionary to victims of sex trafficking and in seminary. It’s not deconstructing, it’s losing the filter of the Word through the doctrines, preachers, and ministers of my past. It’s about redeeming God’s Word through a lot of reading and study.

A Biblical Woman Blessed for Her Faith

One of the earliest “aha” moments on this journey of redeeming God’s Word, happened around Christmas time 2013 when preparing for that Sunday School lesson I wrote about in my last blog. During Jesus’ ministry on earth, He had an encounter with a woman who said, “Blessed is the mother who gave you birth and nursed you.” (Luke 11:27) Until 2013, I had always thought Jesus’ response was harsh toward his mother. Jesus replied to the woman, “Blessed rather are those who hear the word of God and obey it.” (Luke 11:28 NIV).  For years I interpreted His response as “don’t bless my mother,” as if a period followed “mother” to make it a complete sentence. I further read and believed it as Jesus going a step further and saying, “instead of blessing my mother” bless those who listen to the word of God and obey.

Let me pause here and state that I was raised in the church. I read my Bible, studied it, and was a youth group leader as a teenager. I was not ignorant of what was written in black and white (and red for Jesus’ words!) in the Bible. But, I had also been reading the Bible through the filter of what I was hearing on Sundays, what was communicated verbally and nonverbally. And, maybe, I am alone in having never realized that Jesus was blessing His mother for HER obedience after hearing the Word of God. But, I can say I don’t ever recall a pastor, youth minister, college minister, or anyone else whose teachings I fell under state that connection. I always heard that verse in context of others. Others are blessed for obeying God; others are blessed for hearing the word of God. Not Mary, or not her specifically, but everyone else.

Jesus and Women’s Roles

Maybe for some it doesn’t matter that we never heard a sermon connecting the blessing directly to Mary. However, when I made that connection between Jesus’ blessing and His mother, it opened my eyes to Jesus’ soft heart for women. It opened my eyes to how Jesus, very subtly, liberates women from the value that society placed on them, as mere procreators. He doesn’t state what a woman’s role in the church is, but He does show us the answer. It’s a big deal that Jesus affirms a woman to do what God has called her to do, regardless of what that calling is.  

My kid, tween, and teen self needed to hear those connections. I needed to hear that Jesus affirms whatever God has called us, as women, to do. I needed a pastor to stand up in the pulpit and use Mary, as a woman, as the personification of faith and obedience; for a pastor to affirm that Jesus affirms a woman’s calling, whatever that calling may be.

Mary, A Women of Faith and Obedience

Jesus also affirmed Elizabeth’s blessing on Mary (and thus her ability to bless), saying the same thing as Elizabeth said in Luke 1:45.

Mary - a woman - heard the word of God and obeyed and that's why she's blessed. This is not recorded in Scripture, and I’m making assumptions solely based on the knowledge of human nature, but don’t you think she had people tell her she couldn’t do this? That she shouldn’t carry this child to term? She was not married, her pregnancy was scandalous and, who would really believe her when she said she didn’t have sex but rather it was really the spirit of God who impregnated her. Don’t you think she faced ridicule?  Yet, she knew what God told her. She obeyed and had faith in Jesus, who He was and who He was to become. And through all the side eyes, shaming, gossip, and unbelief in her pregnancy story, she persevered and had the baby Jesus whose birth we celebrate this time of year.

Mary, We Can Learn from Her Story

Mary’s faith and obedience set the bar for all of us – men and women. We can learn from her story, as a woman, that a woman’s faith and obedience is affirmed and celebrated. Most importantly, we can celebrate in the fruition of her faith and obedience – the birth of Jesus and the new covenant He represents.

Does God Love Me?

If you’ve asked that question, or you want to know more about a woman’s role in the church or how God values women, click here for a free resource, 5 Strong Women of the Old Testament who demonstrate God’s everlasting love. This will help you discover the truth about what Scripture says and open doors to a deeper faith and service to God.

Women often feel unseen and not valued. I help women understand how God sees and values women and gives women value throughout Scripture, so that women can live in the freedom of God’s everlasting love.

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The Virgin Mary Sings My Spirit Rejoices, My Soul Glorifies: A CHRISTmas Story

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Woman of Faith: a CHRISTmas Story